Contrast
May 9th
Walking around Victoria where so many memories were created... I felt it. Spending time with my daughter and grandson... I felt it. Putting on my backpack and doing a long distance walk I really felt it. With every step I felt the contrast of where I was to where I am.
Walking the Camino my friend Christian would say how he loved just walking and listening to the birds and I was envious. 4 years ago my brain was so full I could barely walk without crying. Now I am here, enjoying the sounds of the birds, filling my eyes with the abundance of green and savouring each step, until my body had enough.
Now that my life is at a place where I am really happy my brain doesn’t take me down canyons of regret, self doubt, pity, anger and wow is me. But what should I think about? I know I will start to work on other peoples lives.😜 I quickly stopped from this landslide as it is not my responsibility to fix anyone else. That responsibility sits squarely on their shoulders. If my mom wants to spend my whole journey worrying about me than that is her issue not mine. I am out here fully enjoying myself and that is the only thing I am capable of doing.
So I let my brain relax, not think and enjoy my surroundings and the solitude. I saw only 4 bikers on the trail and they peddled by without a word. So it was just me, nature and my thoughts. I let it dwell on the hard steps it took as it moved up and felt the pressure on my feet as they went down hill. I spent a lot of time thinking about water as there were no water stations and I didn’t bring much water. With the temperature in the high 20’s I realized I should have put more thought into this. I thought about my journey ahead but didn’t have a fixed outcome instead pondered possibilities. I am not creating any image of what this journey will look like I will just let it be what it is.
I know my purpose and that is to help people move through their loss to a place where they can let themselves live fully. I feel I am capable because I have moved through loss and now love this place where I am. The only place I am is here.
Right now I am in my brother and sister-in-laws home. They are at work and the kids are at school I am relaxing in their beautiful home and doing some writing plus making a press release. I will send the release to community centres, libraries and different organizations before I come so I can walk with people.
I am looking forward to walking with you!
Walking around Victoria where so many memories were created... I felt it. Spending time with my daughter and grandson... I felt it. Putting on my backpack and doing a long distance walk I really felt it. With every step I felt the contrast of where I was to where I am.
Walking the Camino my friend Christian would say how he loved just walking and listening to the birds and I was envious. 4 years ago my brain was so full I could barely walk without crying. Now I am here, enjoying the sounds of the birds, filling my eyes with the abundance of green and savouring each step, until my body had enough.
Now that my life is at a place where I am really happy my brain doesn’t take me down canyons of regret, self doubt, pity, anger and wow is me. But what should I think about? I know I will start to work on other peoples lives.😜 I quickly stopped from this landslide as it is not my responsibility to fix anyone else. That responsibility sits squarely on their shoulders. If my mom wants to spend my whole journey worrying about me than that is her issue not mine. I am out here fully enjoying myself and that is the only thing I am capable of doing.
So I let my brain relax, not think and enjoy my surroundings and the solitude. I saw only 4 bikers on the trail and they peddled by without a word. So it was just me, nature and my thoughts. I let it dwell on the hard steps it took as it moved up and felt the pressure on my feet as they went down hill. I spent a lot of time thinking about water as there were no water stations and I didn’t bring much water. With the temperature in the high 20’s I realized I should have put more thought into this. I thought about my journey ahead but didn’t have a fixed outcome instead pondered possibilities. I am not creating any image of what this journey will look like I will just let it be what it is.
I know my purpose and that is to help people move through their loss to a place where they can let themselves live fully. I feel I am capable because I have moved through loss and now love this place where I am. The only place I am is here.
Right now I am in my brother and sister-in-laws home. They are at work and the kids are at school I am relaxing in their beautiful home and doing some writing plus making a press release. I will send the release to community centres, libraries and different organizations before I come so I can walk with people.
I am looking forward to walking with you!
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